#i’m also in shock right now
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this is a sick joke
#f1#formula 1#williams racing#i feel sick#WHAT ABOUT LOGAN?!#I DONT CARE HE'S UNDERPERFORMING#YES I KNOW THIS IS A COMPETITIVE SPORT#BUT DELUSIONALLY SPEAKING I DONT CARE?#i’m so sad right now#i’m also in shock right now#i definitely didn’t see this coming#that was sarcasm
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the most devastating part of being an adult by far has been realizing bit by bit that Every food opinion i had when i was 13 was entirely wrong
#within the last month i have realized that i don’t hate smoothies#which was massive because i would go out of my way to Not have smoothies#overnight oats#which was also baffling cause soggy oats. no.#but aparently they’re good#believe me even i’m shocked#AND NOW#after being VIOLENTLY AGAINST THEM FOR TEN WHOLE YEARS I HAVE FOUND GOD IN AN AÇAÍ BOWL#i hate it here#having a crisis#my mom was right#and i’m mad about it#not a tag#from saph
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anyways thinking abt the amount of people involved in jin zixuan’s death is gonna make me a little insane. like u have wen ning who physically did it. wei wuxian who lost control. jin zixun who planned the ambush. jin guangshan who gave the fucking order to kill wei wuxian in the first place because his son *checks notes* wanted his wife to be happy. the many other people in jinlintai who knew that the ambush was going to happen. and then jin guangyao. oh boy. jin guangyao knowing about the ambush, being involved with the hundred holes curse, hating jin zixun, and then sending jin zixuan to the site of the ambush like. buddy how many birds did u kill with that stone.
#obligatory ‘i love jin guangyao rights and wrongs’ tag#so i don’t get called a jgy hater. i just think the guy is fucked up and i like that abt him#also ik with the way this is formatted for bare minimum comedic effect it looks like i’m ragging on jgy the post#but let’s be real discovering that jgs gave the order for wwx to die /because of the invitation/ sent me into shock#like yeah jgy we know ur involved here 🙄 ur dad on the other hand tho#i used to feel ngl bad for jgs i’m regards to jzx’s death#bc honestly jzx2 would be arrogant and prideful enough to plan the ambush on his own#but now knowing jgs’s involvement???? like okay. okay. he started the plot that killed his son.#and also. as a jgy stan. yikes a-yao! wow bud! can’t wait for u to tell ur nephew that his dad had 2 die!
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“if paul was bisexual/queer why wouldn’t he just come out by now?” why WOULD he tbh 😭😭 like idk i just think at 81 years old it’s probably not something PR man paul particularly feels the need to share publicly
#especially since he’s married to a woman - knowing paul i feel like he’d probably (incorrectly) think it’d be a betrayal to nancy/linda#i get the vibe that for paul it’s a bit ‘out of sight out of mind’#like yeah i’m not with a guy right now so why tell people#who knows maybe he’ll shock us one day but it seems like despite him clearly having some unresolved feelings and pent up guilt abt john#he’s also content with leaving things as they stand - continuing to emphasise how much he loved john without making a statement#all of this is assuming that he’s even cognizant of his own queerness which is doubtful at times 😭#paul mccartney#the beatles#john lennon#mclennon#john and paul
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you: ily (i love you)
me, an intellectual: iicgesahttimhtwnshabatlygm (if i could gather every star and hold them tightly in my hands, they would not shine half as bright as the light you’ve given me)
#i am unwell about pulp right now#i think i’m still in shock from that last song in part 3#every time i listen to it i break tf down#matt dahan when i get you#when i get you matt dahan#i am also unwell about paper stars#i just#i love them so much#they’re so#god#pulp musicals#pulp 4#pulp musicals episode 4#the searcher in the shadows#john herschel#rose stratford#paper stars#matt dahan#thank gravity#pulp 4 spoilers#tsits spoilers#my post
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Mirrorverse! Mirrorverse! MIRRORVERSE! MIRRORVERSE! MIRRORVERSE!!!!!!
#LETS GOOOOOOOOOO#i LOVE mirrorverse Stuff#inject it into my veins#Star Trek#French trek#ds9#what’s not to like about Evil Kira’s giant alarming crush on good Kira#this also extends to all mirrorverse btw#I totally forgot we were approaching this episode#my day has been made#mirrorverse garak is also the most dramatic person I ever met#which indicates to me that garak is sublimating so many Urges for the sake of polite society#shocking I know#gimme those evil bois#nothing is more fascinating than watching someone interact with a) themselves and b) not-right versions of their friends#also Julian was like I’m so happy we’re friends now :))) right before being yeeted with Kira and they’re for sure gonna bond now
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I’ve been watching the OA which I know now is just fucked up enough to maybe not be a great idea when you’re already feeling mentally unsteady but I’ve just finished part one and dear god why don’t people talk about this more it’s so complex and the world building leading up to puzzle pieces matching up it’s heart breaking and it’s breath taking and I am so fascinated by it and the many many questions it leaves me with
#the oa#it’s nearly two am and I’m dog tired and I’m scared and I’m sad about a lot of things going on right now#but I really like the idea that maybe if you have the will and some information your whole reality can change everything can shift#maybe to a dimension where things are better more peaceful where you feel safe and comfortable and happy#also i looked up the purple thing because it is so goddamn overt and i tried to avoid any spoilers but it looks like that never gets touched#on like what they made it hit you over the head with purple imagery and then not let you know what they meant by it#please feel free to gush over the oa with me because I’m shocked I don’t see more people talk about it
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/4f6abfc7ea3c2b39d01aeea80c9c283d/1c2712b3f8d45476-09/s540x810/bfeaec0ec12377a0dba371fca41fce0a8b4e6ada.jpg)
Look man I just think it’s a shame that Lon Chaney Jr’s horror film debut usually gets cut from the roster.
#also I understand this is the rare pair of all rare pairs#but god I’m fascinated by the potential dynamic of Dan McCormick (the man-made monster) and Frankenstein’s creature#because their fascinating inversions of each other?#like Dan is this good hearted circus performer who’s taken the various tragedies of his life in stride#(from his backstory of being an abused orphan to right when the audience meet him when he’s the sole survivor of a horrific bus crash)#only to get his mind melted when some mad scientist figures out that Dan’s apparently immune to any sort of damage by electric shock#who then takes advantage of said mind-melt to make him kill the only doctor who might have saved him and to turn himself over to the police#go through the entire trial unable to defend himself and then be PUT TO THE ELECTRIC CHAIR#walk out now that he’s juiced up enough on electricity to function#stumble through the woods killing and terrorizing people because he’s physically incapable of touching anything#kill the mad scientist behind it all and then kill himself by draining all the electricity from his body#which all seems just kinda like excellent set up for SOMETHING with the creature#if only because with the creature’s modern electricity thing pairing nicely#with Guy who needs to be charged with deadly amounts of electricity to function#like I don’t have coherent thoughts but it feels like it’s got so many fun opportunities.#my art#man-made monster#universal horror#lon chaney
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Okay because my mind’s still on the subject, I have a bit of a weird question, but I just want an answer
So like, my favorite type of drama in series is usually familial drama, most often ones between parents and their children. And also usually, those dramas that I love are specifically between father and son
And now I’m wondering, what are parent-child dramas/dynamics that involve a female character usually like? As in, mother-son, father-daughter, or even mother-daughter? And additionally, are they as interesting as father-son dynamics? Because I feel like I don’t see nearly enough of them, or at least, they never give me that same amount of intrigue or they just aren’t as focused on
By which I mean specifically in my context, would they be interesting in an action based series? I have a particular taste, namely that I like my series (mostly this applies to shows, I’m a bit more flexible with games) to be more action focused, or at least have some fantastical elements to it, or else I don’t care. I’m not interested in soap opera kind of drama, I want something that would fit in an action based show
Sorry, again this is probably a weird request (and to be honest I really don’t expect answers, posts of mine like these usually get little to no attention), but it’s on my mind. I feel like I see so many interesting father-son dynamics and conflicts, but I never see one that involves a woman, at least not when it comes to parent-child dynamics, and not ones nearly as interesting
#I do think it has to do with the demographics of the shows I watch#or at least the ones that I watched as a kid and where my tastes stem from#most notably Ninjago but there were others#one coming to mind was Kaijudo which I loved as a kid and am still fond of (even if mostly just for Raiden’s plots)#(I’m neutral on Gabe and do not care for Allie but Raiden Bob and Saguru are all interesting to me)#anyways going back to my point those and other shows were usually marketed towards boys#and so as a result were probably made to be more male centric#and I think up until at least the past 10? years or so female characters in those shows weren’t usually written the best#as the writers were probably also all men#and so as such the male characters usually have all the interesting stuff#and the conflicts I like#especially as someone who isn’t a big fan of romance which is usually something that comes up with female characters#hell I’m shocked when a series places equal weight on a female character’s relationship with her brother#as well as her love interest#which right now I can only attribute to Xenoblade 1 but still#(and I know Fiora and Shulk’s relationship is more important but Shulk is the main protag so I get it)#fuck I’m writing too much#point is demographics and old writing conventions are probably the cause#and it’s probably gotten better but I don’t know a lot of good female parent-child relationships#questions#tv shows#video games#random stuff
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I started watching Link Click and I just finished episode 1 AND NO FUCKING WAY THEY JUST DID THAT 😭 WHYYY
#NAH CAUSE WHEN SHE BUMPED INTO THAT GUY I KNEW IT WAS ALL OVER#cheng xiaoshi and lu guang be like: we saved the city ✨ *got a woman killed right before she was going to reunite with her parents*#I’m still in shock I didn’t think they were gonna subvert expectations like that 😭#but it is a time travel show so I should’ve expected that tbh LMAO#I’m very intrigued I definitely want to watch more now#also the soundtrack is god tier btw#my posts
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💕💚
#so. Rambling on this my 28th birthday#I think I might have some kind of hormonal/mood imbalance#maybe. I think that could be likely#and I also think I have very fast emotional cycles#so I work through things quickly#and so I’m in kind of a pattern right now where I post in utter anguish#and the anguish is REAL and I am by no means faking it#but then it resolves. Not even the thing that causes the anguish but the feeling itself#and I just feel better and then I move on#and I am trying to get somewhat of a handle on what exactly it is#and I know I don’t owe anyone an explanation of what I post#but I guess also I would like to#and I think—as I type this out—that what’s happening to me right now#is TWO things#and one of those things is the very real very new pains of adulthood and life#that are hitting me like a shock to the system#but then ALSO some old emotional echoes that need to be purged from my psyche#that are not in fact how I want to deal with things or react to things#but which flare up in response to triggers#and cause anguish so bad it is literally physical#and I would love to be able to distinguish between the two#because there IS much that is hard and scary and painful and confusing in my personal life right now#and also there are simply old wounds and fears at play that I would like very much to set down#and allow myself to change. In response to which I would like to choose a new way of thinking!!!!#a truer and different attitude!#and yeah. it’s so hard. It’s SO HARD. It’s SO HARD TO ACCEPT THAT IT’s BOTH and it just AHHHGHHHHHHHHHHHJJ#!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! anyway thank you for listening and for seeing and for taking the cries of anguish posts#I guess I just wanted a follow-up of some kind#because sometimes I feel insane and I feel like I LOOK insane#and it’s awful
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I want Ruby to go apeshit on Neo so bad just fully lose it bc “oh you’re hurt and upset because you lost someone you care about and blame me for it? What about everyone I’ve lost because of you?”
#rwby#Ruby rose#neo politan#which is not right it’s not a game of who has lost the most#but Ruby is in a bad spot right now and already lashed out at her friends and family#I cannot imagine she’ll treat someone who’s been trying to kill her for several years with any amount of sympathy#aren’t you tired of being nice? don’t you just want to go apeshit#it’s so messy all of it and I’m here for it and I’m especially here for the catharsis that’ll come from when they begin to heal#also I don’t think neo is heartless/undeserving of redemption#I don’t know what redemption looks like for her yet#but I still think about when she tried to kill Ruby in v8 but got yang instead#there was the briefest look of shock on her face
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hi so i just finished bridge to terabithia and now i’m unwell and my eyes are red because i’ve been crying before i’d even reached 20 minutes of it for i actually knew what was going to happen and by the time i reached an hour something something i just straight up sobbing screaming into my pillow. and now it’s 12 am and i’m still thinking about them. because god, look at them, how they were, the little world they lived in, wouldn’t you just love that, to run away, to escape, to grasp that childhood naivety and innocence that you lost a long time ago, to feel the sun in your skin and the air in your lungs and to paint fantasies and laugh and play and run hidden away from the world and find an old run down tree house and decided to make it your own little shelter and pin up canvases on the worn wood and paint and let your creativity goes wild and have someone understand you and gets you and do it with you, and wouldn’t you just love to have something so constant, so sincere, so genuine, so pure, so real, that there wasn’t anything else. if i knew i was going to cry this much, if i knew how much space this movie would make in my life, i wouldn’t have started this movie tonight. i would have been in peace on the floor of my room, not realizing how badly i actually want something like this even though i would never unironically admit this to anyone in my life or even myself when i’m outside of the familiar place of my mind, for that matters
#bridge to terabithia#how am i supposed to recover#i wasn’t planning to write a paragraph about it but yeah i kinda love this movie i guess#i needed a good cry and the universe didn’t stop me from choosing this movie i don’t know if that’s nice or simply mean#i was going to watch la la land after this but that’s not gonna happen now#i’m not reading back what i wrote otherwise i would just delete it because i’d think this movie deserves better more coherent thoughts#and i’d say that i’d just rewrite it tomorrow but then i wouldn’t#because nothing would ever beat the “everything i create has to be great or nothing” in me#and i never am proud of what i made unless it’s supposedly only for my viewing#so i actually don’t know if what i just wrote make sense but yeah#my eyes feel so weird right now#also the ending was definitely up to interpretations!! (spoiler alert* just in case)#i myself personally like to believe he dreamed up the last 30 minutes of it and didn’t even go to the museum#and so he’ll just wake up definitely shocked but then still find leslie in her house who was just about to meet him so they could go!!#and because the rope was cut off by the lightning from last night they decide to build the bridge so everyone could cross safe and sound!!#i like my ending better they really should change it#but no all and all the end was really beautiful#even though it took me maybe even an hour to get through it because i keep sobbing and have to repeat over and over to hear what they said#yeah okay anyways sorry for the rant<3#i’m not sure what this is#but glad i could get it off my chest#let’s see how to tag how to tag#movies#just#childhood#whatever <3#nadirants
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got out of a longterm relationship and immediately started having a flirty silly hookup situation with one of my friends who is abt to leave the country … my decisions boggle the mind
#i never talk abt my personal life on here anymore which is so funny cause …. i used to do that non stop and now im a Mystery#i still live with said ex who is moving with me to another city cause i feel bad if i don’t like let her move w me#also like we are friends it’s just A Situation and we also have a cat tg and he’s the loml#how many lesbian stereotypes can u fit in one girl ….. the answer may shock you!#emmyposts#a little bit afraid that i’m a bad person and a bit afraid cause i don’t feel much about anything right now except the need to Dissect#also started new medication <3 finally .
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I’m so tired.
#how do people make friends as adults#like I’ve been at uni 3 years#I’ve joined clubs#gone to events with people#cooked dinners and had takeaways sat in the living room#and yet somehow always seem to be an after thought#I’m literally a week away from handing in my dissertation with lots of work today#and the housing situation here sucks#and two people who I’ve been talking to about housing#who know how badly it all sucks#have put in for a flat of their own without saying anything#and I get it#it’s not really a shock cause like they’re a couple that can get a 1 bed and split the cost#they’ve been together 18 months#but I’m not even worth the talk apparently.#is it me is there something fundamentally wrong with my ability to make friends#or am I just really crap at picking people out#and like. they’re not awful people don’t get me wrong#but I also reckon if I went home from here for an extended period of time.#or left after uni#I’d never see any of them again#and apparently I feel badly enough about it all that I need to shout into the void here.#something that I do not do at all#but I have no idea what I’m doing now and finding somewhere new to live that is walkable to the uni is really difficult cause#for a uni town they sure don’t like students in any of their properties#I have so much work to do I should not be worrying about any of this right now#but I’d like to just play the switch instead and forget about this project or other people for a while#and I can’t cause this is due in on Wednesday and there’s still lots to do#and I can’t even complain about it to anyone cause they all talk to each other#a little circle of gossip that just goes round and round
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Now I don’t know what to work on 😂
#rambles from the floor#I mean I could do the next chapter but it feels too soon to work on it right now?#like I have it started (wow!!) but I think I need a break before working on it#but also I’m kinda in the mood to write...#I don’t know I’m kinda still in shock I actually finished it#whew
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